http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/index/ en benita@espositoinstitute.com Copyright 2010 2010-02-14T15:53:00-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/welcome/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/welcome/#When:15:53:00Z Are you a S.M.A.R.T. woman, or a man who loves such an awesome woman? S = Spiritual M = Mature A = Authentic R = Responsible T = Trustworthy Do you want flourishing relationships? My clients often ask, "Now that I’ve attained a measure of financial success, what will it take to create a deeply fulfilling loving relationship?"  You have come to  the right place if you are a confident strong woman, (or a man in love with such an awesome woman) and healthy romance has posed a challenge in the past. You’ve probably had more than one relationship that was disappointing, and you don’t want to repeat that pattern any more. Welcome!  I’m Benita A. Esposito, MA.  Authentic Relationship Coaching starts with helping you get clear about your vision of what really works for you and what doesn’t. What are your core values that define your True North? Who you really are? How do you go from being a strong independent woman to co-creating a happy inter-dependent relationship? How do you manage conflicts to generate win-win solutions? These are a few of the key questions.   Receive free educational articles and event notices. Type your name in the box at the top left of this page. See it up there? Receive a free 15-minute get-acquainted coaching session. Type your request in the Contact Us page.  Who uses Authentic Relationship Coaching? (1) You are single and you want to transform self-defeating patterns. You want to develop a flourishing relationship with your Authentic Self, and you want to grow in spiritual intimacy. You want to get it right this time. (2) You are dating or engaged. You are excited because your dream just might be coming true, but you are scared all at the same time because you don’t want to repeat old patterns. You are smart enough to know that you may not be objective enough because of all the happy hormones fogging your rational ability. Your friends can’t be objective enough either. What if you ignore important red flags this time? You want an expert, objective coach to give you feedback. You want to set a healthy foundation so your relationship flourishes forever. Or you want to get clear that this is not the right relationship for you. (3) You are married or co-habitating. You want to set a solid healthy foundation for an enduring, flourishing relationship that lasts forever. I work with clients to prevent painful patterns from ever developing. I also work with marriages where conflicts have mounted up, and both people want to make changes. My intention is to stop painful patterns through preventive education and coaching. This is not psychotherapy. If you need services of a licensed psychotherapist I will refer you. My recipe for a flourishing relationship that lasts.   1. Be true to your Authentic Self. 2. Eliminate limiting patterns. 3. Develop spiritual intimacy so you feel held in the arms of Love. 4. Improve communication skills: empathy and assertiveness. 5. Develop conflict management skills so you both win. 6. Reduce stress so you can rest well. 7. Increase your life-work balance; set priorities. 8. Heighten your intuition to be discerning. 9. Increase your career happiness and creativity.  Olympic athletes hire a coach to attain their next level of mastery and so do S.M.A.R.T. women and the men who love them. My clients understand that to increase business success, they must continually upgrade their inner world. They want to invest in their loving relationship as well because they want an absolutely flourishing life! I’m an expert in the inner world to help your outer world show up just the way you want it to. Formats: Telephone Relationship Coaching, Teleseminars, In-person Relationship Coaching, Retreats, Online Home Study Course, Articles, eBooks and Speaking Engagements provide educational venues to uplift consciousness on the planet, one relationship at a time starting with Your Authentic Self. Testimonials  Click here. Click here for Bio: Benita A. Esposito, MA - Relationship Coach Take this self-test.  Are you ready for relationship coaching? Receive a free 15-minute get-acquainted coaching session. Complete the form on the Contact Us page. Located in Young Harris & Atlanta, Georgia, US. Phone coaching connects us, wherever you are in the world. Phone for Relationship Coaching: 770.998.6642 Contact Us      Associate Member, Worldwide Association of Business Coaches (WABC) May 28, 2010 2010-02-14T15:53:00-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/relationship_testimonials/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/relationship_testimonials/#When:19:19:00Z "After 3 very long and painful months of traditional "talk therapy", we went to...no, we were guided to Benita Esposito. With her loving,  non-judgmental guidance and coaching we learned what she meant by "going straight up the mountain" toward healing not just our relationship with each other, but our relationship with ourselves. We are sure that Benita’s influence on our lives will be forever." - P&J G. RN, Employment Recruiters "We saw 4 therapists before seeing Benita and our marriage was still in trouble. I began working with Benita alone and then we started relationship coaching sessions. Benita has an uncanny ability to understand each of our unique personalities, and to help us build a bridge. Now, thank God, our marriage is strong and we are both thriving. The work we did with Benita along with the homework we were given gave us the skills we needed to improve our relationship. I have learned how to interact with people in a genuine way and I love the results. I love myself and others respect me more.  I no longer interact with others in a way that I am not true to myself and I feel stronger for this. Benita’s coaching and mentoring is invaluable. She is loving, compassionate, determined, and she helps me attain my goals in a safe and loving environment." – N.A., speech pathologist "I am married to a physician, and I am his surgical assistant. Since we are doing Benita’s Mentorship Program together, I finally feel like we are a team, working together to heal. God bless you for helping the healers to heal. I had no idea that I could reach the deep level of healing that we did in such a short amount of linear time. For me to move out of my head and into my body was what I truly needed in order to feel, really feel, what was inside."   - D.C., RN  "I continue to be thankful for all I have learned about my inner world and resources. I think of you with gratitude when I need to draw upon those places in me. I still remember the day I heard you say. "Do you want to be like an oak tree? When everything tries to shake you, you have your roots in the ground.” I really wanted that, but did not think I could be it. I have reaped the rewards of those days many times over. All the tears, fear, pain, money, hassles and being humbled was worth it. I cry as I think of the tenderness and love with which you helped to birth my Authentic Self. Where would I be today without that work? Not where I am. If only you could meet the man I have drawn to me. My husband takes my breath away with his exquisiteness. Never could I have been with such a man in such a way with out all of my past and all of the work we did, you and I." - P.B., RN   "My relationships have improved, especially with my wife and children. My business has tripled over the past year. I am happy with myself. My life is fun and in balance. Benita has made it easy for me to work on me. I have never felt wrong working with her. I always feel stronger after a session with her. She deals with me from a point of wholeness, not from lack. She communicates directly and lovingly. I am more of a man and the better for having known her." - T. G., Remodeler, Carpenter, Mechanic, Electrician "Our marriage has shifted from one filled with constant struggles, tension, and unhappiness, to one with better communication, compatibility, and experiences that are fun. Thank you so much!" - J.H., artist "The goal of having a happy, healthy relationship was the most elusive one of all.  Benita’s coaching helped me prepare for a relationship.  Then I met my girlfriend.  As the relationship deepened, we occasionally had conflicts that could have destroyed our relationship, or at least inflicted wounds that could have permanently injured it. We met with Benita to discuss these conflicts and learn new ways to work through them.  I’m very happy to report that the techniques she taught us helped us to handle the occasional conflicts much more effectively. When we discipline ourselves to use the techniques, we get through conflicts much quicker so they don’t damage our relationship.  As a result, we are more comfortable and confident in our relationship, and our future looks brighter than ever. Thank you, Benita!" - J.C., Writer/Editor/Trainer RETREAT TESTIMONIALS Last night while soaking in the hot tub,  I had a mental slideshow of past retreats and how transformative they’ve been for me.  For many years there’s been a deep ache inside of me because my father didn’t affirm me. This unresolved pain caused great difficulty with my romantic relationships. During the breathwork session at the last retreat, while I was in a dreamy state, I appeared as a radiant bride and my Dad finally gave me the adoration I have wanted all my life. Now six months later, I still feel the love that was planted in me during that retreat. What a priceless journey, worth more than gold!  - T.H, Entrepreneur * Stock photos have been used to preserve confidentiality. 2010-01-01T19:19:00-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/fees/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/fees/#When:03:20:00Z During an initial free 15-minute conversation, I want to hear about what you want to create in your life. I’ll share how I will support you to create your dreams. At the end of that conversation, we’ll discuss the fees. I’ll do my best to craft a program that will meet your needs and your pocket book. Please email me at Benita@EspositoInstitute.com.  Or call me at 770.998.6642 to schedule your free 15-minute laser coaching session. Contact Us. 2008-06-03T03:20:00-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/benita_a_esposito_story/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/benita_a_esposito_story/#When:14:46:00Z Credentials After earning a master’s degree in clinical psychology, I worked in two private mental health agencies in Iowa and Missouri facilitating out-patient psychotherapy and adult education. I managed a community organization program, developed public relations and marketing campaigns, and started an employee assistance program. Having high autonomy needs, 7 years after earning my master’s degree, I decided to open my own business. I opted out of the licensed psychology umbrella so I am no longer a psychotherapist. I have maintained a private practice for 2 decades providing personal executive coaching and human potential training to high-achievers and entrepreneurs. My Giftings.  I am a bridge for successful people to combine the strength of their intellect, the compassion of their heart, and the wisdom of their spirit. There is a similar pattern among high-achievers and I can spot it so my clients make rapid progress. I can see when my clients are about to make personal or business decisions that will generate pain, and I can steer them away from difficulties. I can help them see their defensive coping mechanisms, and coach them to eliminate blocks and learn effective life skills. I can easily detect emotional blockages and limiting beliefs that hinder a person’s health, their relationships, their relationship with God, and their success. As an ambassador for God, I often hear the voice of the Holy Spirit telling me what to say to my clients and His healing love flows through me. I frequently experience energy rushes in my body and that means that truth is being spoken by my clients or by me. I often see an entire life pattern connected with a presenting issue, and when I coach clients to address the root of the problem, they enjoy transformation quickly. All the credit for healing and transformation goes to God. Benita A. Esposito’s Story As a teenager, I was fascinated with the miracles of Jesus. When he promised us, “You can do the things I do and more,” I took Him seriously.  I wanted to lead a Christ-like life, and I wanted to help other people learn about their true identity in Christ. As a child and young adult, I found myself finishing other people’s sentences because it was so easy for me to know what they were thinking and feeling. Later I came to understand that this is a gift of empathy and is common among highly sensitive people. I experienced a lot of emotional anguish as a young adult. I could empathically feel the pain in my family, and I absorbed it while doing my best to be the peace-maker. I unconsciously thought that if I could get them to calm down, I would feel more peace. That did not work, and it was not until my 20’s that I started doing my own inner work instead of trying to get everyone else to change to make me happy. I was anxious, worried or depressed most of the time although I did not show it. I learned how to project a successful appearance at an early age. Like most families, mine was not trained to manage emotions or communicate in healthy ways to resolve conflicts. The resulting stress tore me up but I never showed it. I tried to cope by being a high-achiever and getting good grades. Chronic pain and fatigue plagued me from childhood.  In my 30’s and 40’s, I realized that I was unconsciously driven to succeed because I yearned for my father’s love. I thought he would give me recognition if I excelled. I never told him that because I was too scared to tell him, so he never knew until much later after I had done lots of healing. There was an unwritten family rule to not talk to dad about our feelings. Like many men of his era, he believed he was being a good father and husband by being stoic, responsible and providing for the family. He did not know how to communicate from his heart until late in life. I dove into my inner healing starting in my mid 20’s after I completed my master’s degree. I had the great benefit of two teachers. (If you have the opportunity to develop a close relationship with a teacher, I highly recommend it because it will be one of the most memorable experiences of your life.) I wanted to learn how to develop healthy relationships, communicate and resolve conflicts. I wanted to learn how to stop being codependent and heal at depth. I wanted to develop my gifts as a mature woman.  I needed to learn how to feel my emotions, reduce my stress and care for my body instead of over-work to prove my self-worth. After much deep work with my teachers, I summoned enough courage to speak directly to my dad about the emptiness I experienced in relationship with him. That was the scariest thing I had ever done in my life. I realized that if I did not take responsibility for creating the intimacy that I wanted with him, it would never happen. Much to my joy, he listened attentively and compassionately. Every time I talked to him after that, he grew a little more open, a little softer, and a little more expressive of his affection for me. For that I will be eternally grateful. When he died in 2005, we were at peace with each other and bonded. I thank God every day for this healing in our relationship. The emptiness I experienced in relationship to my father, my pain, and my extreme sensitivity became the unconscious motivation for excelling in my career. I have come to realize that the hidden insecurity stemmed from an under-developed relationship with God. I was looking in all the wrong places for love: affirmations from men, women, and career success. The Fruits of My Journey When I become emotionally triggered, I remember to take my pain to The Father. I ask for His love to pour into me and heal me.  I ask for insight. I can feel and manage my emotions while I think clearly and stay grounded in my body. I can empathize with people and see their point of view even when it opposes my own, and maintain my center. I no longer see uncomfortable emotions as my enemies to be eliminated in order for me to be OK. I have developed compassion for myself and others, and eliminated lots of judgment. My own deep inner healing helps me be able to stay present when I coach clients with intense emotions. I teach them how to manage their emotions, take responsibility for them, and connect with God. It takes courage to enter the heart of a scary emotion, explore the root of it, and stay fully connected with the Father. This is the level of mastery that I experience. Time and time again, I have found that going into the midst of the emotional catharsis opens the doorway to divine revelation, instantaneous insight and healing. There comes a time when words cannot take us into pure experience and we have to set aside our intellect. My life is a testament to the purposeful use of suffering.  Without it, I would not have developed such a close relationship with God.  Day by day I learn more about my true identity in Christ, and I learn how to work with Spirit to be prosperous. Depression, fear and anxiety no longer derail me for very long. I teach others how they, too, can diminish their stress and experience a fulfilling life rooted in the relationship with God. I have learned how to eliminate workaholism and take good care of my health. Therefore, I can coach my clients to create balance in their lives. I coach my clients to know their intrinsic worth and value in God, which is entirely independent of their performance.  I walk my talk most of the time. I know I’m not perfect, and that is no longer a requirement for inner peace.  I also like to grow because it is fun to experience greater levels of mastery, and sometimes that requires no pain at all! Just fun! 2007-11-10T14:46:00-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/press_kit/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/press_kit/#When:19:41:00Z What Makes Benita A. Esposito, M.A. Unique? Benita is an intuitive visionary who easily spots people’s potential along with pesky limiting patterns that thwart success. When people enter Benita’s presence, they feel safe ... safe to open, safe to explore, safe to risk, and safe to thrive. Benita incorporates wholistic methods based on spiritual principles that are more effective than traditional cognitive methods alone. Along with Benita’s natural empathic ability, the Holy Spirit guides the coaching.  When appropriate, Benita shares insights about energetic blocks so clients can efficiently progress on their transformational journey. When it comes to relationships, Benita has a keen ability to understand individuals and build bridges between people.  The compassionate relationship Benita fosters with her clients is the life-giving connection through which God works. Benita coaches people in beautiful Nature settings which promote transformation in a gentle, comforting manner. Clients appreciate Benita’s courage to tell the truth, her transparency, and her authenticity. They most often describe Benita as creative, direct, sensitive, deep, rigorous, compassionate and calm.  Benita combines her masters degree in psychology with spirituality, sociology and business success principles. With 3 decades of professional experience and her own deep inner work, Benita offers clients a wide and deep array of wisdom.   “I have been astounded these past fifteen months, when I have brought Benita personal issues from A to Z.  She always comes up with yet another unique approach to coaching me. I’m amazed at how her approaches always work.” - L. B., Technical Writer Accomplishments. Benita A. Esposito, MA was featured for her work with women’s groups on CNN. She developed and co-hosted the radio show, “Your Authentic Life” on Radio Sandy Springs in Atlanta, Georgia. The author of a Georgia newspaper column and a guest of numerous radio and TV shows, Benita educates and inspires audiences to create a fulfilling life rooted in the Authentic Self. She publishes a monthly newsletter and authors articles on topics related to the Emotional Intelligence, mind-body-spirit transformation, and consciously creating the life of your dreams. She received the award of Outstanding Young Women in America early in her career. Benita’s strengths include the ability to (1) combine logic with empathic intuition so people transform at depth vs. short-term fixes, (2) translate people’s thoughts and feelings into words so they can understand themselves and each other easily, (3) tailor coaching and education to individuals’ unique learning styles to help them achieve efficient results. Benita A. Esposito’s Story.  Acclaimed by her colleagues for her brilliance and creativity in her 20’s, Benita’s keen intuition, innovative methods, and sincere enthusiasm to make a difference in the world won her professional recognition. In the early years, Benita struggled with physical and emotional pain. Bouts of anxiety, occasional depression, chronic fatigue, muscular pain, and digestive disorders.  She went through her own share of relationship struggles and as a result can spot red flags that most people would overlook. Benita acknowledges her teachers with deep gratitude for pointing out her blind spots and ushering her through dark passages where she was shown how to step into the courage to be her Authentic Self.  Similar to Chiron, the mythological wounded healer, Benita has used the pain of her wounds to seek tools that truly work. Because of her emotional and physical suffering, Benita  has developed empathy for other’s pain, and offers wisdom of 3 decades of research in relationships, mind-body healing, personal mastery and emotional intelligence.  Benita has examined patterns, pinpointed underlying insecurities, and transformed them in herself which enable her to be a highly effective coach. Benita enjoys a measure of inner peace that many people desire. She’s paid her dues to get here, and it is her greatest joy to share the wisdom to make the way easier for others. Inner healing occurs when we accept ourselves where we are each moment.  As we heal and regain more access to our Authentic Self, we can more effectively create a life of true fulfillment, not just material success.  Benita’s daily spiritual practice includes a rigorous examination of her life. She is known for walking her talk. The Healing Presence of Nature.  Benita resides in a home she designed and built, nestled in the North Georgia Blue Ridge Mountains overlooking a pristine lake that looks similar to the banner on this website. Her interests include designing and building houses, hiking in the beauty of Nature, gardening, music, caring for her cats, and rowing her rowing shell as a moving meditation on the lake.  Highly Sensitive Person.  Benita is a highly sensitive person (HSP) who thrives in the beauty of Nature. (See Dr. Elaine Aron’s website featuring her amazing research on The Highly Sensitive Person, it gifts and challenges. Dr. Aron calls HSP’s the priest/ess class of society, the wisdom keepers.)  Memberships. Associate Member, Worldwide Association of Business Coaches (WABC)  AIWP Ordained Minister Click here for relationship and life coaching testimonials Click here for corporate training testimonials. Click here to read the weblog. Click here to read Benita Esposito’s articles. Click here for Benita Esposito’s bio. Click here to listen to a sample of guided meditation CD: "Journey into Wholeness." Click here to contact us. 2007-11-09T19:41:00-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/contact_us/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/contact_us/#When:14:21:00Z High-achievers, we want to help you create the most fulfilling personal and professional life. Please tell us your interests in the “Select Desired Services” box below. Feel free to write us with your questions or comments, and we will respond to you as soon as possible. Thank you for your interest. Phone us at 770.998.6642 (Eastern time zone, USA) Email us at Info@EspositoInstitute.com * Indicates required fields   2007-11-09T14:21:00-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/resource_links/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/resource_links/#When:13:59:00Z The Highly Sensitive Person and The Highly Sensitive Person in Love by Elaine Aron. http://www.hsperson.com/ Father Richard Rohr. Center for Action and Contemplation. http://www.cacradicalgrace.org/ Plumbline Ministries. Arthur Burk. http://www.plumblineministries.com/ John Gottman.  Researched based tools to strengthen relationships. http://www.gottman.com Transformational Business Coaching, Jim Alvilhiera.  http://www.tbcoaching.com/ Some of our Favorite Products   1) "Wave Form I" Audio CD for deep relaxation and rejuvenation. http://tomkenyon.com/store/abr.php Orders by telephone: 888-649-5670. Alpha and theta brainwave entrainment. 2) Music to Improve Relaxation. Research by Dr. Lee R. Bartel. Compositions by Daniel May.   2007-11-09T13:59:00-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/services_corp_training_formats/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/services_corp_training_formats/#When:13:52:00Z Formats for Learning On-site training and team building Off-site intensive retreats in the beauty of Nature Tele-seminars Relaxation and stress management CDs. Articles Executive coaching telephonically Tagline: Your Authentic Life. Anything Else is Compromise. Click here for Corporate Testimonials. 2007-11-09T13:52:00-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/services_how_we_help/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/services_how_we_help/#When:13:45:01Z Self-Awareness for Personal Mastery Define Values, Mission and Purpose Learn Values-Based Decision-making Skills Eliminate Self-sabotage Increase Self-Confidence and Self-esteem Manage Change Increase Innovative Thinking Boost Prosperity  Business Relationships for Success Team Building Communication Skills Conflict Resolution Skills Trust Building Empathy Skills Negotiation for Win-win Solutions Health and Well-Being Stress Management Relaxation Skills  Balancing Personal & Professional Life Click here for Coaching and Training Formats. 2010-02-01 2007-11-09T13:45:01-05:00 http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/coaching_formats/ http://www.espositoinstitute.com/index.php/site/coaching_formats/#When:13:38:01Z Formats for S.M.A.R.T. Relationship Coaching Private sessions for individuals and couples Telephone coaching sessions and teleseminars Workshops for the general public Intensive Retreats for individuals and couples Relaxation and meditation CDs. Writings: Articles and prose poems Tagline: Your Authentic Life. Live it. Share it. Click here for testimonials. Ask for your free 15-minute get-acquainted coaching session. Email Benita@EspositoInstitute.com Phone: 770.998.6642 2007-11-09T13:38:01-05:00